What should we do to be happy?
For a long time, surveys have been conducted that have shown that most young adults believe that getting fame and wealth is essential for a happy life.
But a Harvard study, perhaps the longest in history, suggests that one of the most important indicators of whether you age well and live a long and happy life is not the amount of money you accumulate, nor the popularity you receive or acquire, There is a much more important measure of health and well-being in the long term, and this is the strength of relationships with your family, friends and partners. This study of adult development at Harvard, followed the lives of 724 men for 78 years, and illustrates, what is the source of happiness in life. Of all these participants, less than 60 of the original group remain alive.
The psychiatrist Dr. Robert Waldinger, who is the current director of the study, graduated as a doctor at Harvard in 1978, 40 years after the program began, and is the rapporteur of the lessons that emerge from the tens of thousands of pages of information generated on the lives of the participants, second-year students at Harvard and young people from the slums of Boston in 1938. The most relevant lesson shown by this great study is very clear and forceful: “Good relationships make us healthier and happier “
Happiness and a healthy life is based on good relationships with family, friends and the community, happiness is love and service.
So what should we do to be happier?
- It is clear that if having good relationships gives us more health and happiness, then we should avoid loneliness . Living isolated is toxic and kills, isolated people are more susceptible to health relapses and their brain functions decline more precipitously.
- Nor being surrounded by hundreds of acquaintances is what will keep you healthy and happy . Happiness does not have to do with the amount of relationships or friends you have, but with the “quality” of the same, you can feel alone in a big party or in a crowd.
Good relationships protect the body and the brain. A secure attachment relationship, in which you feel you can count unconditionally with the other person, protects memory and cushions the aches and pains of aging.
It is important to always take into account:
- The importance of taking care of our family and friends, of maintaining the connection with good work or study colleagues, of those who sometimes distance ourselves after retirement or when we finish our careers.
- Let us emphasize to our children and grandchildren that we also think when young people that perhaps wealth and fame was what we needed to have happiness and a good life, but that time convinces us that a happy life is built and strengthened with the firm and reliable links that we form with our family, friends, community, and with this beautiful country that saw us born.
- That a good quality relationship means a relationship in which you feel safe, in which you can be yourself. Of course, no relationship is ideal, but those are qualities that make people flourish and strengthen.
To be happy is not enough to transform our state of consciousness, we need to mobilize our environment, no matter the size of our influence, that will allow us to become agents of change with a simple, but deep reflections: What we are doing individually for us to be happy and healthy? What is our contribution so that the world we live in is getting better? If the answer is proactive and entrepreneurial, then we are transforming the world from our corner, because we have made life decisions that transcend in others.
Am I doing things that have a meaning for me? Am I doing things that make me feel that I matter in the world? These are the questions we ask ourselves when we talk about happiness.
- We do not talk about being happy at every moment, because that is impossible and we all have difficult days, weeks or years.
- As for fame, it’s not that it’s bad, there are famous people happy and unhappy famous people, it’s not getting sick or dying in their search.
- The same with money. We are not saying that you can not propose to earn more money or be proud of your work and that others notice it. But it’s important not to expect your happiness to depend on those things.
- Happiness is what happens from the skin to the inside, not what happens outside.
We often have a hard time being happy because we believe that happiness is having what I want, it is to make it happen according to my expectations, it is to achieve goals, it is to be happy and happy, to have a good time, and maybe that’s why it costs so much to be happy , we expect so much of the happiness that we have made it impossible. To be happy, is to be serene, to have peace, tranquility, because we are on the right path, the one we have chosen, because we love what we do and not when we are doing well on that path.
Happiness is what happens from the skin to the inside, not what happens outside, happiness depends on our perception of the environment, not the environment itself. We must deal with this, since it is not a right, to be happy is an obligation. To be happy is not to have what I want, it is to love and passionately love what I do and what I have.
Living in this way depends on how we approach each of the events of our life, it depends on our attitude and that is happiness. Live as we breathe, taking and releasing, thus admits no mistakes.
Being happy and being healthy is a decision of life, start today, start now!